Once Best Friend

This song was written upon request. She's a good friend; I happily obliged. The theme is hers. JBoy taught me the chorus chords just yesterday morning. Verse chords are part of my fondly go-to's.

Strum -> Gibberish -> Strum -> Wordflow -> Strum -> Write down -> Strum w/Words -> Done

The throat is a wreck caught from a house sharing sickness. Open the windows yo, drink some [gin &?] juice. Yeahm I like mah teas. But for now, this recording stands.

Once Best Friend

Were best friends

We know this

To go across, it must end

Our time line

it unwinds

though I loved you I too must live

Can't be there

If you're not there

Deeper than what I wanted

So Stateside

My plane ride

I find a life worth living

You know, you know

you're too far away

from me, from me

To be together

So go, so go

and leave me be

alone, alone

Tears shed

I'm wasted

But they won't fill an ocean

I just crossed

So instead

I move on right on ahead

You play games

once best friend

But I've already gone ahead

Here Stateside

I live life

Without one love I once had

You know, you know

you're too far away

from me, from me

To be together

So go, so go

and leave me be

alone, alone

'Cause I'm happy

Without you I'm already happy

Harana (Eraserheads Cover) - Justin & Kelby

Welcome to Eastside San Jose.

Yes this is a serenade in the morning. 

The one at the right is Kelby.  He's a cool cat.

The headless one is Justin. He's kind of a douche.

She's the One Who Likes All My Pretty Songs

Hey - she's the one who likes all my pretty songs
And she likes to sing along and she likes to shoot her cunt
But she knows not what it means
Knows not what it means and I say:

She's the one who likes all my pretty songs
And she likes to sing along and she likes to shoot her cunt
But she knows not what it means
Knows not what it means when I say, yeah




*If you haven't caught it yet, it's a lyrical twist on Nirvana's In Bloom. Sing along if you know the words . . .

She Be the Mute

The truth is that this is the Girl Cycle that has repeated itself since I hit puberty. A pseudo-relationship all in my head from crush to break-up, all silent.

Except it's silent no longer.

For the past year and a half I've been able to transcribe these terrible feelings through a strum and a word. To be shy does not mean I'm empty, no, I'm quite full actually; the quieter I am around a woman, the stronger the affection. To be so quiet and in repulsion of partaking in the modern courtship etiquette of bullshit push & pull games--which I just don't have the callous heart or tremoring patience for--I am left slave to pour all that I am the strength of my honesty and sincerity in just another stupid song.

And no I won't do the "you gotta be kind of an asshole" thing. That's for everyone else. I can only be me.

I'm no longer Chaplin, through my efforts you can hear the soundtrack Smile and--girl--your silence is drying up this attempt to court you and I'm running out of lube to continue. Stay your quiet somber night or take my humble hand and see the phonic shine of dawn?

She Be the Mute

We haven't even started yet

We haven't even met

And I'm already dead?

What did I say?

Everything I felt I said

To you through the internet

And on type and song

I've broken my head

Yes it's easy to ignore me

And think me a creep and weirdo 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Why would you do this?"

Because I know this

Honesty is all that I can do

If you keep to yourself

and nothing speaks from your end

Then this will be our end

That's it

So you'll tweet what you feel

And leave me breaking over

Alone aching cursing

What did I do wrong?

If your shit gets cryptic

How do I interpret?

Your open-ended gibberish

Let's just end this

Yes it's easy to ignore me

And think me a creep and weirdo 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Why would you do this?"

Because I know this

Honesty is all that I can do

If you keep to yourself

and nothing speaks from your end

Then this will be our end

That's it

Go ahead and ignore me

And think me a creep and weirdo 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Why would you do this?"

Because I know this

Honesty is all I'll ever do

If you keep to yourself

and nothing speaks from your end

Then this will be our end

That's it

I could strum hardest and shout loudest the most cacophonous
song in the still unlit morning and Nick will still chill because
he's cool like that. Do dat, do dat, do do dat dat dat.

That to This Heart

That shut down cold heart
shuts down the pour of this heart, Poor Heart
Kept open to burn but
to be just burned in return
hang hooks, heft of wrought iron
Rips low the beats to lower-the-casket tempos
of cries and aftershock sighs and sighs and cry again
because foolish motley left open to show fucking care for
To pour warmth of this heart to that cold heart
The endeavor made hush by quiet and vain silence
because self-queen esteem and what you got
is
in truth
No Heart, that heart

Fare Well Lovely

Another morning recording ghetto rig. Say "Hi" Santa.

You were always kind to me. You just may be the girl most written. You may never know this just one more tune is again for you, Parachute Girl. I hope for the best for you oh Modern Lovely and it's a hope carried in this song.

Farewell . . .

Farewell . . .





Fare Well Lovely


Oh Modern Lovely, how I loved thee
For the good that you are, do you see it yourself?
When you smiled my world it smiled
And how lovely you are made everything well


And I understand that you must go now
Live on, live on, live on
and I hope for your best


So fly happy oh Modern Lovely
Fare thee well, hope to see you again
When found smile let it shine on
Let us know that you're doing so well

And I understand that you must go now
Live on, live on, live on
and I hope for your best

Troubles got you down
But trouble will let you go
Let you go if you go out


So fly happy oh Modern Lovely
Fare thee well, hope to see you again
When found smile let it shine on
Let us know that you're doing so well
So fly happy
So fly happy
Oh Modern Lovely

So fly happy

So fly happy

So fly happy, farewell

For those wondering what the tuft of hair was at the top of the picture
 above? That's Nick a.k.a Nick-Nick a.k.a. ButtFace, chillin' in
the morning on my windowsill. Yup, ML was kind to him too.

This Time Last Fall (She Chokes on a Dick)

Strumming 5'something in the morning. Then gibbering random to the strumming but then once again it's not random and out goes the stream to set the first verse. Then a follow through. Then top o' the lungs singscreaming before the sun under East Side hill even peeks a hello. Quick record on my mp3 player just to remember but post it up here soon after because the emotion won't be any fresher than it is now, newborn.

Pop from the womb, this is a spank and cry. Yes, it's alive.

It's a harsh one too. I'm all over the place on this one. I hurt too, yo. Rage is man's instant defense, so hear it in the shout. Why rage? Because they say we ought not shed them tears. But I did then. Utterly. It is here now I shout. You wouldn't want a recording of me 2 minutes crying would you? Duuuude. That's not punk, man. Or emo.

That's just . . .

shoot, that's just . . .

sad.

Oh well. You know what happened this time last fall? . . .





This Time Last Fall (She Chokes on a Dick)

This time last fall
Found about it all
She said just a friend
But 5 in the fucking morning call?
What kind of "friend" does that?

I questioned on
What the fuck went on
When I was gone
Though my heart stayed and was not gone
Loved you I did, oh I did carry

You looked away
When asked directly
Is there another guy that you've
Been so fucking loving?
"Yes . . . uh baby no" you said.

Now something's up
In your unsure answer
You're either messing around
Or you're fucking retarded
But bitch, you're a doctor

So fuck you bitch
for fucking lying
All the years loved
You couldn't tell me you moved on to another?

I hope you die with the worst kind of cancer
All painful and tumored
Choking
Choking
Choking from dirt dick been sucking

You goddamn whore
Since you were kid diddled
That's no excuse to have fucked this kid over
That time last fall

Heartbeat

Hey girl. Yeap. I like you. And this is how my heart sounds when I do, I do. Smile on. Woohoo!!




Heartbeat

Across from me, a girl I see
She's so fine oh best believe (How do I know?)
Because my heart it goes beep beep
Quick goes my red for her it beats

Ooh I see the girl look there she goes
She's so fine, her stance and her lingo
(I'd like to be someone known to her)
Watch her walk her walk and her hips go
Then she smiles oh my god it's bingo!
(Would you say hi if I just said hello?)

Here my heart it beats right on
Just for you
Do you hear my heartsong sing right on
For you?


Such a sweet thing that I do see
The perfect muse for whom I sing
Because my heart it goes beep beep
To think of you my red it beats


Ooh I see the girl look there she goes
She's so fine, her stance and her lingo
(I'd like to be someone known to her)
Watch her walk her walk and her hips go
Then she smiles oh my god it's bingo!
(Would you say hi if I just said hello?)


Here my heart it beats right on
Just for you
Do you hear my heartsong sing right on
For you?

And here it says, hear it says 
I'll love you
If you let me, girl

Can you hear my heartbeat, it beep beeps?
Just for you, my heart yes it does beat
You're the one I'd love to care for

Can you hear my heartbeat, it beep beeps?
Just for you, my heart yes it does beat
You're the one to love to care for

Things I Like on a Girl

Red   
   --Red will win these eyes in kidlike fascination. A favored color so goes the favor to a woman seen in red. Lips, polish, dress, etc., somewhere there is the visual charm sought by this red heart.

From My Deathbed

Listen up. This is what happens on a strum and a hum then the follow-up gibberish attempt to put words in but in a stream-of-consciousness attack the words that came out this evening was--is now--the first verse. When not in a serenade about them Maidens, Death is the everlasting call. I'm not as down as I used to be but like a good tree capable of bearing the bad fruit, the ill is still in me somewhere. Evidence. Go.






From My Deathbed

When they take me away
From my deathbed
I'll be happy
So Happy
So dead on my bed
Away from living unhappy
So Unhappy

This life sucks anyways
You can take it all away
Fuck it all

When they take me away
From my deathbed
I'll be happy
So Happy
So dead on my bed
Away from living unhappy
So Unhappy

They never loved me anyways
All the girls ran away
From me

Head hurts, I'm fucking sad
Heart hurts, am I so bad?
Is this the life I had to have?
Ah fuck it

When they take me away
From my deathbed
I'll be happy
So Happy
So dead on my bed
Away from living unhappy
So Unhappy

Hi Again Flower

       



          Phenomenal is the flower to sight this day. Post-silent year then back on approach, you expect a hesitant bud to whisper but then--what sweet surprise--she speaks, oh yes, in full bloom! In smiles and growth we are reacquainted on a carousel that circles forth to ride the seconds better than the twinkling ones before and up to look brighter, make brighter, live brighter this engine life. Hi, oh hi again, good old friend. It's swell to know at mid 20's is a peace, we type the time gracefully ahead.

Such a Bitch

Probably the quickest "song" I've come across. Hit that "C" and sing, sang, song. Nothing duper recording though, recorded straight to my mp3 player to log the idea. More of a song bit though, aye? Those in-betweener stuff you see in albums, filler, that takes you from one full song to the other. Skits are fun. Do you think it'll make us more attractive to the ladies? Maybe I ought to be getting ready. Skits have a role, yes, and with my fondness for the drone stuff on 89.7 KFJC this is first drone I've stuck to and went alrighty. "Hello angst. Yuppo you're in there. So Waarrrrriooors come out tooo plaaaaayaaay!"

 Uh huh here we go. No set lyrics for this one yo. Listen and catch all the little references if you can. It's like Pokemon in song form, peoples. Dun-dun, dun dun!! =) So go on then, an enjoy bitch.

Flea Market Finds 10[7-11-14]12

The following is a collection of cheery things I've gathered the past Sunday-Thursday-Sunday at the Capitol Flea Market. Here we go . . .

The Haul

Well on! Another cane to join the other two. This one is collapsible and is
all prepped and ready to go with hairbands on the handle for just in case.

______________________________________________________________________________________________

A fine find whose brilliance include "Even men of the same age
and the same country do not always speak the same language."

Because Lord knows I need it, as socially retarded as I am. So how do you say hello?

                                                          

                                                                            Whoa uh oh it's them ladies again! The tough! The wise! And the pretty!

Morning Walk

After breakfast I like to take a walk. Helps the digestion in this belly o' mine. Just a neighborhood walk. Out and nearby the schools or down to Capitol Square Mall. On Mabury there were these 3 chicks and the best of them had a red pullover, nice long hair and a nice tush. Yup, nice tush. She was across the street so I spotted that P.Y.T. under no duress and enjoyed what I saw. There was a hinted glance from her end but no matter, that girl was something in beauty full view today. As I looked on with her gone far down the road and my neck and torso at a twist to look back, to the blindside left of me at a lot exit a dark grey Toyota Tacoma KRUCHUNKH! stopped abruptly. Holy hot damn! I almost got hit! Duuude. I really ought to stop getting into accidents/near accidents when museum'ing the fair ones. It's a dangerous thing appreciating women, aye? Last time, when I saw a pretty butterfly and her good friend, I backed up to a parked car behind me HUHTHUD! Damage consisted of a bent license plate, is all. ~Whew~. Again, noticing wahines is a risk.

But a worthy one. Believe it.

You know what it's saying? "I'm a tree, bitches."

I decided, "To Target today" because I wanted to get a few more rounds in with the Undisputed 3 demo made-to-play at their XBOX360 stall. Good game, this. Kicking faces in and all that. With all this writing/songwriting/chick-thinking that's got me plenty (& happily) occupied I just don't have the time to enjoy a videogame as much as I used to. A walk and some gametime is a fine marriage. There are trees all over the neighborhood, wondrous trees of all sorts! I do like them trees. Green, lively, proud even. With all the madness around them in this sometimes fucked-up world a tree stands as is, stable in the doctrine in its knowing that it's there to be a tree. So I high-five 'em when I walk under their leaves and feel their greeny goodness and try to get a rub off their life's undeniable tenet in the hopes that I too will truly
know who I am in this, yes, sometimes fucked-up world.

Majestic Electric & Coffee for Two

My complete and total inability to converse with a girl I admire leaves me incapacitated. On a half-breath, zero eye contact and even times of avoidance of a general area that surrounds her, I am left null. But yes I do feel and carry the amorous feeling like something electric and it drives me and I ride it oh yes but with a forlorn silence. Though I am quiet, I am triumphant. Because of her. Whoever she may be.

So what do I do with this majestic electric?

Where does that waterfall rush over in broadcast whitewater and rave?

With my sincerity voraciously thrust forward and outward to a point because a man is made to feel king, this outpour of emotion has only a couple avenues; the girl herself not one of them, to my insecure and knowing embarrassment that I am but a fright to females as I, the jumpstart and some might say hyper romantic. Again, apologies ladies. As standing king by the apparent graces of just one girl, I lay court alone and declare the majesty in the duo of poetry or song. Love is what I got and no fair maiden stays to be queen.

So write on, sing on this caesar in the written sense, but know in truth I'm just another motley fool.

Check this, how I declare:



Coffee for Two

I'll be waiting for you
I'll be waiting for you

A once happy girl
you lost your way
In the arms of a broken charm
She did not stay

Heart still scarred
You ask that I just wait

So I'll be waiting for you
Maybe one day coffee with you

You're now back to the person
You used to be (happy)
With your girls, school and work
Your priority
Somewhere in your reset world
Please save room for me

'Cause I'll be waiting for you
We'll be having coffee for two

I know about your boy
He went did you wrong
But I'll do you right
If it's alright
You can be my world
And we'll live much more together
Be much more together

And I will wait for you
so fine to wait for that happy girl
Just find your way
Yes I'll wait then we'll get coffee girl

She Who Carries This Day

Hey Ambrosine, c'est pour vous . . .



She Who Carries This Day

The thought of you will carry my day
A kindness from your word go plus, 
Add seconds
To the mirth on a bagpipe breath, breathe in & out
And know
That it's you who -- with her own seconds -- thinks well of me

By your applause I will step witty, dance Charlestons in Paris &
Stand proud, chin up and face this world with gusto
Knowing how I know that it's you who cheers a strength
Through and through and only by your favor, I am Hercules

So Athanatos, see how I roll with that Helios on over
When you say great, darling
and like, oh darling
and smile, whoa darling
So pos[itive] I am, I'll walk this day poetically, near-immortal

Because the thought of you will carry

And on the night of this good day
When the shine you gave glows provocatively defiant in a room slept yellow
My reply will reflect how sweet I thought of you
How by your good graces, kind darling
I lived this momentous day

The Paint of the Day

And you'll have lived the good day

And He who has shown the good day

Will paint the sky and remind you

Of such a day

When blessed was your step

And the strength that you kept

For faith in Him, here is the good day

Hey Ambrosine

So it starts with a hey. "How have you been?" How have I been? And in these words is a call to disaster, a query with the assumption of some fantastic answer where a king is king and the kingdom he sits throne to is in peace and golden prospers, where no dragons spit fire, burning land. But 'tis a question asked in a time of ashes. How have I been?

Dear, this a truth that I do not parade, for what parade drags yards of uninflated cartoon balloons, withered roses, shattered stiltmen, kung fu dubbed-like lip sync singsongs and epileptic dance numbers? But you ask for this parade, darling, and there ain't no Santa at the end of this one; somewhere he got stuck in a notoriously unswept chimney and died from cookie malnutrition.

In the glory of your higher education and the brightside you found in life, there are others like me, who sit pale from no sun and remain dumb for not grasping $40,000 degrees.

I am. A loser.

And it's tough to tell you that outright, miss.

The Ghost

A sunrise ago, strumming and humming 5'whatever in the morning, I blabbered out the first two lines. Thought ooh that's an idea and kept it in mind. Affection as a nuisance then to be killed for it? Oh my, an impassioned ghost! Then by happenstance I saw the first muse reappear, aged neat and blessed and in the buzz of a feeling that once was, I wrote a song, yes another song.





The Ghost

And in this love I was your foe
You won't ever see me again I know
You ran me over when I stood
To bleed out for you, I would, stand

North, the farmer's wife now are you?
The smile you smile is it true?
You never smiled when I was around
The love from your side was never found

The promise I made was something that you may have never heard
Yes 'til the end I'd think & sing & strum about all your worth
But as gone as I am, what is it worth?
One ghost unheard

The First Muse

The first muse
but first, breakfast